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quarta-feira, junho 21, 2006

The walls outside… the walls within…


Why do I stay in my room?
Why do I feel so heavy, so drained… so transparent… fragile… that stepping outside is as being a thin glass of ice, walking under the sunlight - in a square full of noise… I may be melt, I may be broken…

Why to endure a realm of our own?
Why to become prisoner of our minds?
Because – outside, there beyond these walls – we may find colors, we may find joy, we may find day… but we may be in an empty place… a place where no one may truly see us, a place where no one knows no one…

Staying inside is becoming able to accuse something or someone of our pain, of the echo of sorrow that is around each time we feel broken… with a part missing…

They say we have to adapt.
They tell us how to honor values and virtues – still, they are paid to say so…
They teach about things they never saw or tasted… things that I know are ever shifting and never defined… though – they always paint them as “truth”… and so they doom me in to a realm of lies… those teachers of nothing, those rulers of shades, those chiefs of no one… no one exists, nothing around is the truth…

They say we must be truthfull – still, they lie in each breath they may take…
They do not love – still – they tell us that’s the truth…
They tell us we are loved, we are the center of their existence – still, they are never with us, always selling their life as an excuse to not take hold of the reigns of their own destiny… slaves who feel so alone they doom others to slavery so they are not alone… liars! Parents of deceit...

Why to leave the room?

Here I may pretend nothing else exists.
I may pretend – the world around – that living lie of hollow voices and shades they call truth, is a nightmare existing far away…

Why I don’t keep in here so?
Because it becomes hard to breath.
Because the space around seems to become so tight, because I believe…

I believe – beyond all this chaos, all this fun fair of appearances – the only thing a human being wants… it’s most deep desire – it is to be loved…

What is it important if not that?
All the power, all the meaningfulness isn’t a sad shade of that?

Why does the child stay inside the room?
Ask the reverse… what is it outside that can be true for the child?


The child is the only truth, still - what happens when people doesn’t want to be waken up from a dream?

What happens when the child speaks and no one understands?
When everybody is so filled with “truth” no one listens…
When you open your heart but you find out that the world already is as it should be… why am I here so?

When the space this realm demands you to fill is so little you have to choose – or to be chopped in pieces, or to pretend and deceive you fit, or to die…

When all of them fail – you see you will fail as well...
They tried so hard to make you a copy of their own lack of sense – that, in the end – you lay down your tired soul and let it go as waiting for relief for such a burden, such a meaningless journey around the wheel of time.

As a rat running in a wheel that’s inside a cage...

That is why it is a sin when a child comes in to this realm– because those who bring them do so by egoism.
They do not know what they are doing – they do so still.
And the truthful cultures still cry when a child is born and still rejoice when it has been released…

Where is the famous love of the mother who wishes so much to hold a baby she will open a door towards heavens so a soul may come here... in to this?
Does she really know?...

Before you open a door – can you really love someone you do not know - more than your own desire to open it?
Oh Pandora – what are you doing?!...

And – then – the soul is here.
First silent as the realm above.
First ready to be nursed and hold in the arms of those who do not know they do it because they have already lost that same essence… and so they need to see a mirror of what they were, of the realm they too were dragged from… but then…

As the process to shape the flesh in to the image of those around becomes finished, they start to be scared of the reflection of their own making, of their own face.
Then becomes really difficult to love anymore…

Yes – we are all the same baby.

Why can’t we love each other then, when we become this entity who screams it’s pain on the streets, whom builds it’s love in hate and destroys much more than creates?

Why can’t we smile and embrace – as we embraced before the helpless baby – all those babies around, those that hurt as they were hurt, who oppress as they were oppressed, who kill the baby around as someone killed their own inside, long ago?

Why was childbearing set as sin?
Isn’t it easy to see?
Because of our pain, because of our own need and despair, because of our own lack of meaning to this slave existence we keep opening portals to souls so they descent.


Is it a peaceful journey?

Think how it is painful to come in here, feel your own birth, feel how you cried when you first entered in the realm of flesh and bone.
Why do parents desire to bring beings in to here and then shaping them on their own image?
You - vane ego - that needs to endure it’s existence as a disease, passing from one shape to another, from one human face to another...

Can we love all those who are here right now?

Can we love ourselves fully?

No?
So, when that egoism tells you to doom another to your own doom – think more than twice!
Feel – when opening the portal – or you are the master and you are filled with essence, or you are making the worst sin of all – to keep and guard pain on this world while humanity exists as it is.

And – if you truly love – then sacrifice your own egoism, the fear of ending as an identity if you do not spread your seed in time and space; loose the vanity to shape humans at your own image and making... and become humble – accept death and oblivion.

Do not rebel against the nature of things.

Your existence is rebellion... you know that.

Lucifer was cast away because She didn’t bow to creation – so She spread her seed on earth and pain was planted where the garden was.

They didn’t noticed it yet – but they will do.
The time for open war is arriving.

When they realize who brought them here, who raised them, who made them who they are – they will stop being manipulated by the only true Lord of this Realm.

Lucifer was Female...

The light bearer... the life bringer.

Both principples had to be equals and rule. But one tried to take the dominant position and the other denied – so the war started and the realm of time and space was opened.

There is a war that ever existed.
The reality we are told is a deceit – it has been re-invented since ever. The only thing you learn in school is how to turn deceit in to reality, lie in to truth...


Both sides have used it to keep their rule and both are with hands tied to reveal it.

The way of the Sun and the way of the Moon will have to converge.
Eclipse will have to wash their vanity and arrogance away.
Harmony will have to come – if not by love and devotion, then by being both broken in their stiff will to endure as they have.

One way or the other – the war has to end.
Enough of numb ears, enough of stubborn will.

Enough of manipulation as well as brutality.
Both angels will sheath their swords or the swords will be broken, their beings shaded in to humbleness.

Michael and Lucifer will have to embrace again – they will have to be as one once more.

Eclipse – no more night, no more day… no more moon, no more sun… no more God, no more Goddess… ONE

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